“The greatest compliment that was ever paid me was when someone asked me what I thought, and attended to my answer.” – Henry David Thoreau
As teachers we try to ask our students questions that build critical thinking skills in relation to academic knowledge. As parents, we hope to ask our children questions to build self reflection.
Unfortunately, in our busy lives it’s easy to fall into the habit of asking our kids the same basic questions over and over. If your family is anything like mine, those questions get the same routine answers.
This school year I am challenging myself to ask questions that give my family the opportunity to pause, reflect and expand their thinking. If you’re also looking for new opportunities to learn more about your child’s school experience, try asking On Ramp Questions.
On Ramp Questions give kids an easy on ramp to conversation by presenting a very specific topic, but also allow for a wide range of answers.
Some examples of On Ramp Questions:
“What happened today that made you laugh?”
“What do you look forward to each day at school?”
“Which of your classmates is the most confident?”
“Which of your classmates would stick up for you?”
“What made you feel proud today?”
“What made you nervous today?”
“If you had a rewind button what would you do differently today?”
Don’t worry if your child doesn’t give you a deep and meaningful answer right away. On Ramp Questions stick with your child and prompt internal reflection. Revisit your On Ramp Questions and see if you learn something new.
In my next newsletter I’ll talk about Assumption Questions and how they can help build trust and honesty in our communication with our kids.
Assumption questions: These questions assume that something has happened, or will happen. This type of question gives kids permission to talk about topics that might feel more sensitive. These questions come from the world of health care, but we all should practice them with our kids. Consider the difference between these questions:
“You didn’t forget your homework did you?” or “Did you do all your homework?”
The assumption question versions would be
“How many times this week did you forget your homework?” or “What homework still needs to be done?”
Sincerely,
Derrek Berkompas
6th Grade English/Middle School Principal
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